Friday, May 03, 2013

Something benefitial to be share (Reclaim your heart)

nothing much, just that something reminds me on one specific piece of writing that inspired me
it's just something that I've got from the book I've read

perhaps we've been living a hypocritical life, where we just say we love Allah, but the actions don't reflect the same
we hardly feel the love of Allah even though we still perform our duties; prayer, recite Qur'an.

so what is it, what is that particular thing that we've been missing ?
why are we too strayed away from Allah ?
is it because of our duties are still not enough ? 
why are we easily distracted when everything seems to be going downhill ?
what about happiness ? why can't we find the inner peace, tranquility ? 

maybe, maybe, perhaps, we're still not clear about the purpose of this life. 
we experience things in life, and yet never see the connections between them. 
when we are given hardship, or feel pain, we often to consider that the experience may be the direct cause of another action 
sometimes we fail to recognize the direct connection between the pain in our lives and our relationship with Allah

those pain and hardship can act as both indication and cure, for our broken relationship with our Creator. 
Allah says ''Do the people think that they will be left to say 'we believe', and they will not be tested ?.......'' (29:2-3)
in another verse from the Qur'an ''...and We tested them with good [times] and bad that perhaps they would return [to obedience] (7:168)
many of us wondering, why is this happening to us ? how this happen when we've done nothing wrong ?
the truth is : everything in this life is a test. yes, everything in this life is a test
Allah says ''It is He Who created death and life in order to test you, which of you are best in deeds....'' (67:2)

Here we are told that the very purpose for which life and death were created to test us.
 think for a moment about an emergency siren. what is its purpose ?
the siren is an indication and a warning that something harmful is coming. if we hear it, we naturally panic. 
but, what happens when they need to test the siren ?
what happens when it's just a drill to see how we will react ? the test siren sounds exactly the same, but it is ''only a test''.
although it looks , sounds, and feels real, it is not. it is only a test. and we're reminded of that again and again throughout the test.

this is what Allah tells us about this life. it is going to look, sound, and feel very , very real.
at times, it's going to scare us. at times, it's going to make us cry. but this life and everything in it is only a test. it is not actually real.
as soon as we realize that it is only a test, our questions drastically change.
instead of asking : ''how could this be happening ?'' ''why is it so unfair?''
our questions become : ''how should i react ?'' ''how should i pass this test ?'' ''what am i meant to learn?''
''how can we use this test to bring us closer to the final destination, which is, God ?''

the beauty of the tests of Allah is that, after notifying us that they're coming, 
He gives us the exact recipe in succeeding, which is ; sabar and taqwa
who knows, those trials and tribulations could be a ticket for jannah, IF and ONLY IF we've been patient

once we change our lens in which we see our lives, our internal and external response drastically change.
when the prophets before us were tested, it only increased them in faith and obedience.
until we change that lens, we will NEVER move beyond ''how could this happen to us'', 
to realize the true purpose of the test itself : a created tool to purify, strengthen and bring us closer
to the Creator of me and you.

ever since I was a child, I couldn't let go of anything. people, places, events, photographs, moments.
and disappointment for me wasn't an ordinary emotion. it was catastrophic.
once let down, I never fully recovered. I could never forget, and the break never mended.
like a glass vase that you place on the edge of a table, once broken, the pieces never quite fit again.

HOWEVER, the problem wasn't with the vase, or not even that the vase kept breaking.
the problem was that, I kept putting them on the edge of the table.
it is all about attachments, dependencies through people around me.
I depend on them to define my happiness, sadness, emptiness and even self-worth
it was like, I set myself up for disappointment, I set myself up to be broken

yet the people who broke me were not to be blamed any more than gravity can be blamed for breaking the vase.
we can't blame the laws of physics when a twig snaps because we leaned on it for support.
the twig was never created to carry us.
our weight was only meant to be carried by God. we are told in the Qur'an :
''....whoever rejects evil and believes in God, the Most Grasped, the most Trustworthy hand-hold that never breaks...'' (2:256)

crucial lesson here in this verse ; there is only ONE hand-hold that never breaks.
there is only ONE place where we can lay our dependencies.
there is only ONE relationship that should define our self-worth, 
and only ONE source to seek our ultimate happiness, fulfillment
that ONE place is God :')
but the problem is, many of us seek those things (happiness, self-worth, security) everywhere else
some of us seek in our wealth, some seek in health, some seek in relationship.
nope, we'll never find it through those ways
we're like seeking something and coming back empty handed
it was like when you try to dig in concrete with bare hands
not only you you come back with nothing, you break your fingers throughout the process

this life is just temporary, everything around was never meant to be perfect, never meant to last forever.
life : imperfect, temporary
the problem is that we try to seek those perfect and permanent things here
we try to find that here, in this life no, it is against our nature. that's why if we live in this dunia with our hearts, it breaks us only when we stop putting our hopes in dunia, only when we stop trying to make the dunia into what it is not, only then this life finally stop breaking our hearts

nothing happens without a purpose. nothing. not even broken hearts. not even pain.
that broken hearts and pains are lessons and signs for us
they are warnings that something is wrong. there are warnings that we need to make a change.
just like the pain of being burned is what warns us to remove our hand from that wire, emotional pain warns us that we need to make an internal change
pain is a cause of attachments, false attachment. detach from this thing and should only be attached to Allah
the pain creates a condition in our life that we seek to change, Allah says : ''verily God will never change the condition of a people until they change what is within themselves'' (13:11)

after years, I always thought that 'love of dunia' means being attached to material things. 
I'm not attached to material things. I was attached to people, I was attached to moments, I was attached to emotions so I thought that I'm not experiencing that so-called 'love of dunia'
however, I didn't realize this one crucial thing actually, the truth is, the fact is that: people, moments, emotions - they are all apart of dunia I didn't realize that all the pain I had experienced in life was due to one thing, and one thing ONLY : love of dunia
yes, i'm expecting this dunia to be perfect
expecting people around me to be perfect.
expecting my relationships to be perfect. expecting so much from those around me
expectations. expectations. expectations.
and if there is one recipe for unhappiness, it is that : expectations
my mistake was in 'where' i was placing those expectations and that hope
at the of the day, my expectations and hope were not being placed in God
my expectations were in people, my hope was in 'dunia', rather than Allah 

by thinking that i can have everything here, my hope was not in my meeting with God my hope was in dunia. but what does it mean to place your hope in dunia ? it means, when you have friends, don't expect your friends to fulfill your emptiness don't expect everyone around you will get along with you
when you get married, don't expect your spouse to fulfill your every need. when you're in trouble, don't depend on yourself. don't depend on people. depend on God.

seek the help of people- but realize that is not the people can save you only Allah can do these things. the people are only tools, by means used by God. they are not the source of help. only God is. so, when you interact with people externally, turn your heart towards God internally face Him alone. 

don't let your definition of success, failure, or self-worth be anything other than your position with Him. and if you do this, you become unbreakable., because your hand-hold is unbreakable you become unconquerable, because your supporter can never be conquered and you will never be empty, because your source of fulfillment is unending and never diminishes

so the answer for the question ''why do people have to leave each other?'' is : because this life isn't perfect
IF it is perfect, then what would the next life be called ? what would the the hereafter be called ?

after people leave , do they ever return ?
after something we love is taken from us, does it ever come back ?
is loss permanent- or just means for a HIGHER purpose ?

there's something amazing about this life. 
the very same thing that causes us pains also what gives us relief : nothing here lasts
what does that mean ? it means that the beautiful rose will wither tomorrow
it means that youth will neglect me
it also means that the sadness I feel today will change tomorrow
my pain will die. my laughter won't last forever- neither will my tears
we say this life isn't perfect. it isn't.
it isn't perfectly good. but, it also isn't perfectly bad, either

Allah tells us "verily, with hardship comes ease'' (94:5)
growing up I think I understood this verse wrongly
I used to think it meant : after hardship comes ease. in other words, I thought life was made up of good times and bad times
after the bad times, come the good times.
 I thought that this life was either all good or all bad
BUT this is not what Allah trying to tell us. the verse (ayat) is saying WITH hardship comes ease
the ease is at the same time with the hardship. 
this means that nothing in this life is ever all bad (or all good )
in every bad situation we're in, there is always something to be grateful for
with hardship, Allah also gives us the strength and patience to bear it

if we study the difficult times in our lives, we will see that they were also fulfilled with much good.
the question is - which do choose to focus on ?
I think the false thought that we use to think is - this life can be perfect; either perfectly good or perfectly bad.
HOWEVER, that's not the nature of dunia. that is the nature of the hereafter(akhirat) 
hereafter is saved for the perfection of things.
Jannah is perfectly and completely good. there is no bad in it.
Hell is perfectly and completely bad. there is not good in it.
so in answering the question of whether what is lost comes back, let's look at the most beautiful examples :
did Yusuf return to his father ? did Musa return to his mother ? did Hajar return to Ibrahim ? did health, wealth and children return to Ayub ? from these stories, we learn powerful and beautiful lesson : what is taken by Allah is never lost. in fact, only what's with Allah that remains. everything else must vanishes. Allah says :''what is wiyh you must vanish : what is with Allah will endure. and We will certainly bestow, on those who patiently preserve, their reward according to the best of their actions'' (16:96)

sometimes Allah takes, in order to give. but, it's crucial to understand that His giving is not always in the form we think we want. He knows best what is best. Allah says :''...but it is possible you dislike thing which is good for you, and that you love a thing which is bad for you. but Allah knows, and you don't'' (2:216)

but if something is going to be returned in the form of other, why is it taken at all ? subhanallah, it is the process of 'losing' what we are given.
Allah gives us gifts, but then we often become dependent on those gifts, instead of Him
when He gives us money, we depend on the money- not Him
when he gives us people, we depend on people- not Him

Allah gives us gifts, but then we become to love them, as we should only love Him
we take those gifts, and inject them into our hearts, until they take over
soon we cannot live without them, we worship them-as if
the mind and the heart that was created by Allah, only FOR Allah, has now becomes the property of something else  .
and then the fear comes, the fear of loss begins to conquer us
the gift - that should have remained in our hands-takes over our heart.
once, a gift has becoming the weapon of torture and a prison of our own making
at this time, NOW, it is a time where Allah frees us. by ? by taking it away
taking the gifts back.

as a result of it being taken, we turn to Allah wholeheartedly, 
in that desperation and need, we ask, we beg, we pray.
through the loss, we reach a level of sincerity, and dependence on Him.
through the loss, our hearts turn entirely to Him.

here's an example :
 what happens when you first give a child a toy or the new video game he's always wanted ? he becomes consumed by it. soon he wants to do nothing else. he doesn't want to do his work, or even eat. so what do you do, as a loving parent ? do you leave him to drown in his addiction and complete loss to focus and balance ?

you take it away. then, once the child has regained focus on his priorities and balance, once things are put in their proper place in his heart and mind, what happens ? you give the gift back. or perhaps something better, but this time, the gift is no longer in his heart, it's in proper place. it's in his hand.

sometimes, the 'something better' is the greatest gift : nearness to Him
so, the question of 'once something is lost, does it return?' the answer is: yes
it returns. sometimes here, sometimes there, sometimes in a different, better form.

no one likes to fall. no one would ever choose to drown. but in struggling through the ocean of this life, sometimes it's so hard not to let the world in. sometimes the ocean does enter us. the dunia does seep into our hearts.

strayed away for too long, like the ocean that owns the boat, it will take over.
you will sink down to the depths of the sea.
you will touch the ocean floor, you will feel as were at the lowest point.
you will feel broken, surrounded by darkness. 
that's the amazing thing about floor of the ocean. no light reaches it.

however, the dark place is not the end.
as long as the heart still beats, it's not the death of it.
sometimes, the ocean floor is only a stop on the journey. 
it is when you are at the lowest point, you are faced with a choice.
a choice : you can stand there at the bottom, until you drawn. 
or, you can gather pearls and rise back up- stronger from the swim and richer from the jewels.
if you seek Him, God can raise you up, and replace the darkness of the ocean, with the light of His sun.
He can transform what was once your greatest weakness into your greatest strength. purification.
know that transformation begins with a fall.
so never curse the fall. the ground is where humility lives.
take it. learn it. breathe it in. and then come back stronger, humbler, and more aware of your need for Him.

seek God to bring you up. He will rebuild your ship.
the heart you thought forever damaged will be mended. 
what was shattered, will b whole again. only Him can do this.
seek Him. seek the Owner of your heart. seek Allah :)

Ibn Qayyim said :
''syaitan rejoiced, feel happy when Adam came out of Paradise, but syaitan did not know that,
when a diver sinks into the sea, he collects pearls and then rises again ''
there is a powerful and amazing thing about taubah (repentance) and turning back to Allah. we are told that it is a polish for the heart.  what's amazing about polish is that it doesn't just clean. it makes even shinier than it was, before it gets dirty. if you come back to God, seek His forgiveness, and refocus your life and heart to Him, you have the potential to be even richer than if you had never fallen at all.

rise up. rise up to freedom. rise up and come back to life.
leave the depth of your soul behind you. 
your heart can still live and be stronger and purer than it ever was.
doesn't the polish of taubah remake the heart even more beautiful than it was ?
remove the veil between you and Life. remove the veil between you and Freedom.
remove the veil between you and Light.- between you and God.

remove the veil and rise up.
come back to yourself. come back to where you began.
come back Home please. know that when all the other doors have shut in your face, there is One that is always open. 
always , seek it. seek Him, and He will guide you through the waves of the cruel ocean, into the mercy of the sun.

so hazim, this world cannot break you, unless you give it permission.
and it cannot own you, unless you hand it the keys. unless you give it your heart.
take them back. 
reclaim your heart,   and place it with its rightful owner : the God
# Congratulation ! you made-up to finish your reading~ by the way, someone had gave this to me via my email, and I touched with this entry so I decided to share will all of you. Hope it can make us realize :D

special guest :)